On Wednesday, I left work early to meet Nachum at Hillel Yaffe hospital, returning to the X-ray department where Itamar had injected radioactive material into me just over a week before. Now I was to have some other substance injected into me – thankfully, only one injection and it wouldn’t make my urine blue. I was told to go home and drink a liter and a half of liquid then return an hour later.
I began drinking as soon as I got home but it wasn’t easy to drink so much is such a short time. I asked David to take some photographs of me for this blog, but although I stretched my mouth, I couldn’t make my eyes smile.
We went back to the hospital and now, dying to pee, waited to be called for the bone mapping test. My mood at this point was very down and I waited with a great deal of trepidation for what was to come.
The test is not so terrible but in my current state of mind I found it very difficult. I lay down on a table and the technician wrapped a wide belt around me to keep my arms at my side. Above me there was a thick platter which the technician began to lower towards my head. I was reminded of those 1920 movies where helpless maidens were tied to the railway lines as trains trundled menacingly towards them. The imagery I was conjuring up combined with my awful mood brought me to the point where I couldn’t stand it any long and I practically screamed at the technician to stop, even though I knew that the closer the platter was to my body, the sharper the resolution of the picture. Nevertheless, he complied and as the platter moved down over my body, I began to relax slightly.
The whole process was repeated with my head on the side. By the time it was over, I felt emotionally shattered and supremely dispirited.
The next morning, I went to the clinic in Binyamina for a blood test and to have my stitches removed. Nachum had arranged the appointment so that I would have time to get to the clinic in Hadera for a stomach ultra sound. While the nurse was setting up the blood test, I reminded her that Nachum had asked her to attend to the stitches so that I could be on time for my next appointment. Since the bone mapping experience the previous evening, I had felt so demoralized that when she said she had to check if anyone else was waiting for a blood test first, I began to cry. I had became alarmingly prone to tears, which was quite embarrassing – in this case, I was lucky that the nurse was sympathetic and reasonable.
We arrived a few minutes late for the ultra sound in Hadera and then waited an unconscionable time before going into the doctor’s office for the scan. I wonder if doctors / technicians realize that the numbers they bark out to their assistants while moving the jellied joystick over our bodies strike fear in the patients being examined. Apparently, I have a cyst on my right kidney which is common in people my age. Recalling that my lump had been originally misdiagnosed as a cyst didn’t help to improve my mood. However, my liver and all my other internal organs were deemed in good condition.
On Friday, I received the results of the bone mapping and there was nothing more insidious than some sinus problem and an age-related anomaly in my upper vertebra. That was a major relief because breast cancer, when it metastasizes, does so in the bones. It’s what caused my sister’s death.
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